I will become a Handmaiden...
I will become a Handmaiden as silence was a companion in my life.
Mommy's boyfriend said be silent, your Mommy will get mad at you.
So I learned silence.
When Mommy brought home "the evil one" and said they were to marry I stayed silent.
Any time I tried to speak out horror became my companion.
Aunts, uncles, Mommy all saw the "things".
I didn't want anything except to feel safe.
Four little girls locked up with a monster.
You bet we were silent.
He abused me emotionally, sexually, physically, spiritually, and intellectually.
I was silent.
Time passes, truths come out and if we find the right women we can finally end our silence.
I am not a victim
I am not a survivor
I am a whole spiritual loving woman.
I can be silent as a Handmaiden but I am a Warrior with a voice when I need it.
I will speak with silence but I will never be quiet again!
- Patti, NH